I wanna disappear from the face of the earth.. be erased from everyone's memory. My life's not exactly going great right now.. my job's weird, since i'm like 'on call' everyday for the job and i can't make plans. but up till now, the auntie have not called me to go for work. which is totally unreasonable. they have no right to make me wait for their call everyday, making me shelve plans last minute, only to find out i don't have to work. hey, i don't get paid when i don't work and i most certainly don't get paid waiting for work too.. those bastards. treat us like objects. i'm a gonna look for another job. i dun care if she's my neighbour, but good neighbours DO NOT treat their neighbours this way. and to think she literally crawled over to ask for my old uniforms and textbooks every year cos her daughter happened to study at my alma mata (is that how you spell it?) pathetic. if i'm nice to you, i expect you to be at least neutral back. not become a meano.
there's still the horrible a levels results to wait for.. ohhhhhhhh... i always get the sickening pit-in-my-stomach feeling, the stomach acids churning whenever i think of this. oh no...
i've decided to go on my food ban soon. i know it sounds stupid to deprive myself of food, but look at my weight now. i can't afford to let myself turn into one of my relatives on my paternal side. they've got it in their genes to be fat, and really fat, mind you. a little fat never killed anyone. tt's why i'm worried.
the new year, a brand new start, but it seems the past has unfinished business that i have to bring it with me into the new year. so upset.. i can't exclaim with happiness 'happy new year' to everyone or even truly mean it. oh well, that's my life for you.. the ghost of the past will not leave until it is appeased, which is when i finally settle things so that my life can start again. and i just so wish that 'father-figure' in my house would just dissipate into thin air anytime and not come back. my house would become a home then.
PS: es
there's still the horrible a levels results to wait for.. ohhhhhhhh... i always get the sickening pit-in-my-stomach feeling, the stomach acids churning whenever i think of this. oh no...
i've decided to go on my food ban soon. i know it sounds stupid to deprive myself of food, but look at my weight now. i can't afford to let myself turn into one of my relatives on my paternal side. they've got it in their genes to be fat, and really fat, mind you. a little fat never killed anyone. tt's why i'm worried.
the new year, a brand new start, but it seems the past has unfinished business that i have to bring it with me into the new year. so upset.. i can't exclaim with happiness 'happy new year' to everyone or even truly mean it. oh well, that's my life for you.. the ghost of the past will not leave until it is appeased, which is when i finally settle things so that my life can start again. and i just so wish that 'father-figure' in my house would just dissipate into thin air anytime and not come back. my house would become a home then.
PS: es
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